Cynical

Today I found myself in the back seat of a car I never saw again in my life and I was just checking my neck at the mirror. After twenty minutes I decided that I really like my neck.

This is the most cynical i could ever get.

Thank God (Who?).

Have faith in me.

SUMMER WILL BE OVER SOON.

This song makes me blue. So are you.

I am hurt

I am scared
I want to live
I want to die
I don't know where to turn
In the Void
And when
To cut
Out
....
And I see Shadows
Dancing into Doom
In love, holding
TIght the lovely asses
Of the little girls
In love with sex
Showing themselves
In white undergarments
At elevated windows
Hoping for the Worst.

I can't take it
Anymore
If I can't hold
My little behind
To me in my room

Then it's goodbye
Sangsara
For me
Besides
Girls aren't as good
As they look
And Samadhi
Is better
Than you think
When it starts in
Hitting your head
In with Buzz
Of glittergold
Heaven's Angels
Wailing

Saying..

Bowery Blues/ Jack Kerouac

Blue.

You.

This summer / part 01

I would call this summer just weird.

Details..

I broke one heart. I still got tickets from a trip i never had because i was being silly as always. I'm thinking of burning them today when i light my first cigarette after some days. I ate as much as i could from my grandma's great dishes and had my first fight with my grandpa.

I have been awake for more than 31 hours straight.

Highlight..

This morning a car stoped. A guy went out and asked me to follow him, just for a coffee he said. I said "Now?" and he answered "Why? You got something better to do?"

The thing is i still don't.

Just remember that i have a week to spend on you.

Summer is not over yet.

Some people do this for fun. I'm just a cunt.

Just trying to feel some pain.

Help me.

(It was) Monday

Play with me. Talk to me. Pay attention. Light my cigarette. Pinch me. Tickle me.

Can you think something you can do with me?

Come on, don't think it twice, It's summer damn it.

Plus it's Monday and I'm bored.

Am I the only one who misses winter so much?

I've been smoking again. I wasn't expecting something more to tell you the truth. I'm such a fool I know.

Don't deny it, try to say something to make me feel better. Let me smile for a while telling you that all is great, nothing is wrong with me. I'm so happy inside and all. Let me tell you again and again that I have nothing on you. I'm not hurt man. I'm OK. Can't you tell?

Let me say good night and kiss you on the cheek. Try to do the same. And please let me go home as soon as I can. I feel like crying again, shit.

Can't you see? I'm fine.

I promise.