Grey.

You slept with a smile on your face and woke up with nothing left.

What I am doing here?

Oh damn.

You whisper my name but really it doesn’t feel the same.

Oh damn.

I would love to leave this place but I will miss you like hell.

Oh damn.

And so I stay and wait.

You ask me what I need.

I answer something you can not give me anymore.

You ask why I’m still here.

Here, where?

In this bed.

I always come back here to find what I have left.

Give it back to me please. You know what I'm talking about.

Yes?

Sober.

It is quite late don’t you think?

You came like a stream, sitting next to me chewing bubble gum. I can still remember the smell of its flavor.

I don’t remember what happened to me, but for a moment I forgot everything.

Baby don’t go away, I’m still here.

You were looking at my eyes and I was screaming enough but you didn’t stop.

Thank God you didn’t.

Another drink and I might forget my pain.

After 23 years I should have know this game.

But I’m losing again.

23 years of practice. Well not really but I still thought I was good at it.

But I’m here again.

Losing again..

On repeat.

Shhhhh!
Silence..
1
2
3
4
5
I said Shhhhh!
Why it doesn't stop?
I did everything you told me.
I said Silence..

Oh God will it even stop..

Let's do it again..
1
2
3
4
5

I think I'm fine for now.. I think.

Your last night.

I throw all your things in the garbage and I pick them up again one by one.

I even thought of getting a cat but I have a fish and that will make us me and you again.

I stopped crying and I started drinking.

I stopped drinking and I started sleeping.

I stopped sleeping and then I woke up for a lifetime.

I hated my miserable days but most of all I hated missing you.

You stopped calling and then you stopped caring.

You stopped caring and then you forgot.

And as you forgot I became me again.

And you were far.

And I was me.

And it was summer.

And you were far.

Not much free time

I think I'm ruined. But then again this makes me something new and you always loved new things. So enjoy me.

And don’t stop me when I say that I miss you. Cause I did. And you know I did.

Be the new thing for me too. Someone to cry for and someone to hold.

This is personal.

-          Hello Blondie!

-          Hello Sir.

-          What’s your name?

-          My name is Des.

-          And what brings you here Blondie?

-          Well, this is not an easy question. A friend of mine says I’m not quiet myself lately.

-          This is so general. Not yourself, how?

-          The thing is I messed everything up. And most of the time I don’t enjoy what I’m doing, which I used to.

-          Sorry, how old are you?

-          Why you say it like that?

-          No! No reason.

-          I’m sorry about it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. If I was myself I would tell you something funny about the age part. But I can’t anymore.

-          So tell me what you’re thinking Blondie.

[….]

-          Can I ask you something sir? You know my name why you are still calling me Blondie?

-          Do you mind?

-          No, it is just that I’m being kind of dramatic those days and I don’t want to hate you or something.

-          Ha-ha-ha. See? You are finding yourself slowly. This is good.

-          I will let you know how it goes. Bye.