Smoke too much.

It's the second day that this is happening to me. Two days in a row I'm all alone here. My place used to be full of voices, voices I hated, but then again still voices.

We had the same conversation about how we met and I realised that I'm so fucking bored of you. We have nothing else to say, so why do you keep wasting my time?

How on earth I can be with you? All you ever enjoyed after all is my red lips and your full wallet.

My front door is broken and I'm officially broke. 

Just don't quit it.

I don't trust people who claim that they got over their "illness". Are you sure you did love?

You wake up one day feeling all strange. It's like nothing ever happened. It was always there, staring at you. 

You cry a little bit but come on..do it. And let me know if I was wrong. You know my number, don't you?

I know the sound of my "illness". Do you know yours?

Monday movie.

You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar!You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar!You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar! You liar!

I didn't choose you, yet! 

I'm not alone in here.

Red was the color of her hair, 

Brown was the color of his skin.

This is all, we are a pure sin but

I couldn't think of any place better than this.

This situation is not going anywhere and 

you know that I have to choose him.

And you know this will break my heart in two

but eventually i have to leave you.

Friday Night.

- You fuck differently Des.

- It's been years you know.

- Oh, I miss you.

- Seems like you are the pussy in this room.

Frozen.

Two weeks now I can hear a music. I always check my mobile, check around me but always nothing. It feels weird. I was never afraid as far as I remember but now I'm not that sure. Something is pushing me too far and all I seemed to do is hurt myself. I feel ill or should I say that I am for sure ill. Aspirin? No, thanks this won' t help I think.

I was watching a documentary today. I really wanted to write about it but I don't feel like right now. Everybody knows that I don't finish things. Well almost everybody. 

Now all I think about is my ending. I want it to be dramatic. I want it to be in my white car. Everything look better when they happen in white. Is like a camvas and that's what I like the most. I want "Pioneer to the falls" to play loud and when Pauls sings ... "but here it comes the fall" I want to close my eyes and see you and thank you for everything you've done. 

So don't go and fix my car please. It's not necessary. I've got everything figured out.

I miss your birthday, I'm sorry.

My first perfume smelled like pure alcohol, you didn't mind because you thought it was your own breath.
My second smelt like pure gasoline which you found really cool and started calling me "hot thing".

The perfume I'm wearing now smells like me missing you. And you don't even care.